In certain situations you are not being yourself.
And people fall in love with who you’re not.
Does this mean that people, actually, hate you?
Kodėl visi turi būti tokie vieniši, pamaniau. Kodėl reikia tapti tokiems vienišiems? Pasaulyje gyvena tiek žmonių, kiekvienas jų jaučia ilgesį, ieško kitų ir vis dėlto nuo jų atsiriboja. Kam? AR ŠITA PLANETA SUKASI VAROMA ŽMONIŲ LIŪDESIO?
Why do people have to be this lonely? What’s the point of it all? Millions of people in this world, all of them yearning, looking to others to satisfy them, yet isolating themselves. Why? WAS THE EARTH PUT HERE JUST TO NOURISH HUMAN LONELINESS?
— Haruki Murakami, “Mylimoji Sputnik” / “Sputnik Sweetheart”
— once upon a time (tv series)
How do we involve ourselves into so much shit? - I was thinking…
And yet, is it us who constantly make ourselves feel desperate and depressed?
Once, the former president of Lithuania blamed everything that went wrong on the environment. And now, I start thinking that he was, actually, right… There are reasons for this. Definitely are. Let me begin and end all this with only one example.
Let’s presume, you’ve lost some persons in your life. And it was not your fault because people sometimes die…
Let’s presume, those people had a lot of influence on your life. And one day they were gone… just like that.
Let’s presume, you managed to continue on with your life without them.
And then one day, let’s presume, you start seeing these persons in shops, cafes, on streets, buses <…> everywhere. Environment, in short, is where you start seeing, sometimes even meeting, them. Constantly. Almost every day.
Then what happens? You start loosing your mind. First you blame yourself for being stupid. But, eventually, I realized, isn’t the environment filled with people who look so much like the ones you’ve lost. Filled with people who speak and are interested in the same topics as those who are not here anymore. And you perpetually bump into people like the ones you still love….
I don’t really know whether there’s a way to get away, to keep your mind clear and not become as depressed as so many people around you. Because it’s not always easy to change the environment. However, it is really easy to blame it and to continue getting mad.
What’s the moral of this story? - you could ask me.
I have no idea.. I just think that people who are still around should definitely pay more attention to the close ones and try to make their environment as mad-less as possible.
— Cecilia Urbina “A Tuesday Like Today” p. 50